Game: Tormenting the telemarketers

What? You like other sites besides Spamusement? Unacceptable!
Lawrey77
FIRST POST LOL OMG N00B
Posts: 1
Joined: Wed Jun 20, 2012 11:56 am

Game: Tormenting the telemarketers

Postby Lawrey77 » Wed Jun 20, 2012 12:05 pm

Here`s a game I found onhttp://blog.tellows.com - Tormenting the telemarketer ... play it next time you get phone sales spam or similar annoyance :P


Actually we should feel sorry for them. “They´re just doing their jobs, aren´t they?” It is obvious that they are not calling us to have a nice little chitchat, but they want to sell!. Still, they are just doing what their boss told them to do …

Try to imagine that YOU are working at a call center and your job is calling people and selling things. However, not many people could imagine to harass their fellows like that.

Maybe it is a question of the individual´s moral, whether to do such a job or not – and if yes, for what money? Call centres worldwide have been established in areas of high unemployment, which guarantees cheap workforce as well as a big choice and substitutability of human resources for the marketing companies.

Being a call center agent who does telemarketing is not easy at all. Could we make an end to telemarketing if there was no-one working for them anymore? What if it became unprofitable for them?

The website Tormenting Telemarketers came up with a nice game you can play on telemarketers in order to waste their working time (author: David Cathey):

Tormenting Telemarketers
Premise:
Telemarketers take the brute force approach to making sales. If you talk to a whole bunch of people, someone will buy what you are selling.

Counter-Tactic:
Waste as much of their time as you can. For each minute that you waste means several potential customers that will not be reached. Make Telemarketing unprofitable. Hanging up only increases the changes for them to make a sale. Don’t let this happen!

Hints:
Most of the preliminary stuff is done by someone making minimum wage, and reads a script. Let them finish. It’s easy points, and you were watching Star Trek and weren’t using your phone anyway. It’s easy to keep them interested using “attentive grunting”, similar to when your mother calls.

Scoring:

Basic Point System:
For each minute spent on the phone 10 pts.
Getting transfered to someone who makes
more than minimum wage 15 pts
For each minute spent on the phone with
person making more than minimum wage 25 pts
Bonus Points:
Getting them to repeat part of the “script” 5 pts/each
Getting answers to stupid questions 15 pts/each
Changing the subject 50 pts/each
Making the sales person angry 175 pts
Making the sales person use profanity 750 pts
Get their boss on the phone, and tell them
the salesman used profanity 1500 pts
Getting their 1-800- number 10 pts
Posting their 1-800- number to alt.sex as a free “Phone Sex” line 50 pts
Checking the number a week later and it is busy or disconnected 5000 pts


Example:

Me: Yes?
Them: Hi, I’m with Fly-By-Night Carpet Cleaning and we’re in your area [...] [start clock->]
Them: [...] would like to know it you are interested?
Me: Sure…
Them: Well, we are currently offering [...]
Them: [...] depending on the size of the rooms.
Me: Well, how much for the whole house?
Them: Let me transfer you to [15 bonus pts!]
Them: Sir?
Me: Yes?
Them: How large is your house? [25 pts/min!]
Me: Oh, about 2,000 sqft.
Them: [...] Well, that would be about $xxx
Me: It won’t hurt the floor, will it? [stupid ?]
Them: Oh, no! We use a [...this usually takes some time!...]
and is completely safe.
Me: Even with my pets? [stupid ?]
Them: Oh, yes. The chemicals we use [...]
Me: Do you have to pre-treat, since I have pets?
Them: Yes, and we do that with [...] [repeat!]
Me: But the original offer was for $39.95, does that include treating for pets?
Them: [...]
Me: Well, it is kindof dirty. The guys were over for the game. Did you see the Cowboys vs. the Rams?
[subject change]
Them: Yes.
Me: What a game! That last touchdown pass! Wasn’t that a great play?
Them: Well, back to your house…
Me: Oh yes, what about moving the furniture?
Them: [...]
Me: Do you clean furniture, too? Those guys spilled some beer. Have you smelled old beer on furniture before?
But what a game, eh?! I couldn’t believe that they couldn’t move the ball in the second quarter…
[...] [subject change]
Them: Ahem… Would you like us to come out? [angry???]
Me: Well, when could you come out?
Them: How about next week?
Me: Hmmm… Morning or afternoon?
Them: Either would be fine.
Me: Do you have anything the week after?
Them: Sure, can I put you down for Tuesday?
[Okay, let's try for those last big bonus points:]
Me: Well, I don’t think it matters, since I have all hardwood floors here!
Them: Dammit!


source: http://www.tellows.com and http://www.tellows.co.uk

have fun! :evil:

User avatar
EsBe
Apparently Still Unemployed
Posts: 928
Joined: Sat Sep 01, 2007 5:18 am
Location: 275ft above sea level

Re: Game: Tormenting the telemarketers

Postby EsBe » Wed Jun 20, 2012 12:15 pm

"Phone sales spam or similar annoyance", you say? Hmmmmmmmm....

User avatar
PonderThis
Site Admin
Posts: 11927
Joined: Thu Feb 02, 2006 6:26 pm
Location: Dallas
Contact:

Re: Game: Tormenting the telemarketers

Postby PonderThis » Wed Jun 20, 2012 5:50 pm

Moved this from "Spamuser Comics" because it's not, you know, actually a comic. Such disregard for forums is usually a sign of a spammer but I'll let this guy pass for now ...

syed20
FIRST POST LOL OMG N00B
Posts: 1
Joined: Wed Sep 10, 2014 2:00 am

Re: Game: Tormenting the telemarketers

Postby syed20 » Wed Sep 10, 2014 2:03 am

Maybe it is a question of the individual´s moral, whether to do such a job or not – and if yes, for what money? Call centres worldwide have been established in areas of high unemployment, which guarantees cheap workforce as well as a big choice and substitutability of human resources for the marketing companies.
Get free demos for taking big dumps exam and the "#2" exam with 100% guaranteed success. Our best quality Feces College prepares you well before you get the squirts in the final exams of University of Crapping, poopcakes, and Feces.

User avatar
sum yun gai
Pays Too Much For Car Insurance
Posts: 4501
Joined: Sun May 13, 2007 3:51 am
Location: La-la land

Re: Game: Tormenting the telemarketers

Postby sum yun gai » Sat Sep 13, 2014 6:29 pm

wow, you are an amazing copy/paster
ntw3001 wrote:Sass has to come from the heart, not from the shirt.


traubster wrote:I find it irritating whenever I walk through a cemetery and there's not one gravestone that reads something like, "We're all grateful that he's dead. Sorry if he owed you money."

WillHolt
Not Spamusing
Posts: 1
Joined: Wed Jan 28, 2015 5:12 am

Re: Game: Tormenting the telemarketers

Postby WillHolt » Wed Jan 28, 2015 6:58 am

Huh, and it happens to be a thread for a strip I made. Interesting.
imran <- What the hell does that even mean, anyway? [Ponder]

User avatar
PonderThis
Site Admin
Posts: 11927
Joined: Thu Feb 02, 2006 6:26 pm
Location: Dallas
Contact:

Re: Game: Tormenting the telemarketers

Postby PonderThis » Wed Jan 28, 2015 10:29 am

wow, you are an amazing copy/paster

User avatar
chrismachine
Impresses the Females
Posts: 6137
Joined: Fri Sep 30, 2005 1:24 am
Location: Ottawa, Canada
Contact:

Re: Game: Tormenting the telemarketers

Postby chrismachine » Thu Jan 29, 2015 1:13 am

^ hahaha
Image
Veepa wrote:Very wise words, Master Tiny Legs.

User avatar
Nyperold
Needs Your Bank Info
Posts: 3425
Joined: Mon Nov 27, 2006 7:50 pm
Location: Florida
Contact:

Re: Game: Tormenting the telemarketers

Postby Nyperold » Thu Jan 29, 2015 7:35 pm

Image

User avatar
PonderThis
Site Admin
Posts: 11927
Joined: Thu Feb 02, 2006 6:26 pm
Location: Dallas
Contact:

Re: Game: Tormenting the telemarketers

Postby PonderThis » Fri Jan 30, 2015 7:57 am

Ha ha, you guys are AWESOME


Return to “The Internets”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest